Preschool

On Wednesday, June 3, Paul had his first day of preschool! I have been a little anxious about this day for a while. Paul would always get upset when I left him with other people so I just never did it. It always seemed like I was doing things just for myself when this happened, so I would feel guilty and chicken out. I'm not saying this is good or honorable, because it probably isn't, but that's what I did. After we moved to Nashville, it became obvious to me that he needed school. He has always been such a social little creature -- he makes friends at every park and he is so active and wants constant contact with others. He does not play well by himself for long, and Mom isn't always fun enough!

I still couldn't justify preschool or even mom's day out programs without any income, regardless of how difficult it might be to find a spot for him or a place that would allow us to attend for just a few months. I think this was the biggest challenge of our "crazy year", in which we moved three times in eight months. Once we knew we were coming back to Pensacola, I did a little research and then basically fell into a spot at a great preschool in our target neighborhood. We really lucked out! They not only had a spot for the fall, but also for their "summer fun" program. It is not as formal as their school year class, but I thought it would be a good transition for him and a nice break for me. Plus, this way, he would be used to it by the time baby Theo comes, so it would be one less change for him come September.

Luckily for me, Michael was not set to start working until June 15, so we were able to face that first drop off together. Here's Paul before we left for school that first day:

We saw this turtle in our yard as a bonus!

That morning he was very excited to go to school and when we dropped him off in his classroom with his teachers Ms. Stacy and Ms. Huong, he immediately began to play and barely looked up to say goodbye. He had been extra sweet before we left that morning, randomly saying "I love you, Mama!"

Walking into school!

When we got back to the car, "You'll Be In My Heart" from Tarzan started playing. It almost got to me, but still, I did not cry! When we picked him up at 12:30, he was happy to see us but not overly happy -- he had a great day! He was happy all day and did so well. We were so proud! For the next week and a half, this is how every day went. He would get so excited for school he would barely eat breakfast and then bound up to go brush his teeth because he couldn't wait to get there. The teachers would always tell us funny stories or things that he said and we were really feeling quite smug that obviously we had done something right in creating this super confident and well adjusted kid!

I so, so wish I could end it there, but I can't. After about two weeks, we heard that he asked for us and got sad during school, but was able to calm down. Then at home he told us he didn't want to go back to school. And then when we dropped him off he started crying. They told us he was able to calm down and had a happy day. Then he started crying in the morning before we left. It was hard to leave him. Eventually he cries any time we bring up school or he knows he has to go that morning. Every time, though, the teachers say that he calms down quickly and has a good rest of the day, and he always seems happy at pick up and after school! In fact, that's about the only time you can talk to him about school without him getting upset -- the afternoon of a school day. This has been complicated by the fact that last week (after the first two upset days) Mimi had to drop him off and pick him up for us, since I can't drive because of my broken ankle. We just added early drop off and an extra day so that Michael can drop him off and we have someone to watch him for half of Tuesday. He has been a little better with school this week, still getting upset and anxious beforehand, but he seems to be calmed down by the time Michael or Mimi actually leave him. 

It was cute because when Mimi drops him off, she also has Lily. Paul would be crying in the car and Lily would say, "Just give him a minute!" Well Wednesday morning, Michael was going to drop him off with Mimi first so she could take him to school. Paul said, "Daddy, I want you to take me to school." Michael said he asked why and Paul told him he doesn't like it when Lily tries to calm him down. I think she also sings him songs and things like that. To me, I think this means he doesn't like her to see him so upset. (He's 3 so it's not total confirmation, but I did ask him this later and he told me yes, that's why.) I totally understand that because that's exactly how I feel in those types of situations. The older Paul gets, the more clear some of his personality traits become and the more I can see who those traits come from. Anyways, the teachers say this is normal and that many kids freak out for a couple weeks and then re-adjust and are fine. I am so glad we are doing this now and not right before Theo arrives! Hopefully he will have made some good friends by the fall and will love going to school in the morning again soon!